


Cage Free

by TidalDragon



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Animal Friendship, Attempt at Humor, Crack, Developing Friendships, Friendship, Gen, Grants Gone Wacky, Hermione is a God(ess) to a Couple of Rodents, Humor, I'm Bad At Tagging, Scientist Hermione, Very AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:28:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24282091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TidalDragon/pseuds/TidalDragon
Summary: One scientist. Two rodents. Three months before the grant runs out.The story of Harry the Hamster and Ginny the Gerbil.





	Cage Free

_4 February_

_Received word today that the grant will not be renewed. The NIH seems not to understand the value of my work on the future of social integration. Admittedly I underestimated the depth of the hamsters’ isolationist instincts, but nevertheless, I feel that integration remains possible. I continue to hope that HG-12 will form a viable pair where the H7 can reap the benefits of G5’s instincts toward social bonding while G5 in turn can be weaned of its more frenetic and brief connections._

_I take this rejection as motivation to return to my original method. There is only the death of the grant to worry about so it’s the perfect time to implement the long-term approach I originally intended. Deprived of the ability to acquire any additional animals not raised in captivity H7 and G5 are my last hope._

_At worst my career as a primary researcher is over and I’ll retreat to a supplementary hell. At best I can leave this adventure with the high of knowing I have taken one step closer to ending the divisive introvert-extrovert conflict that plagues humanity.  
  
H. _ _Granger_

H7 poked his nose at the edge of his cage, preparing for another day of peace. The food here was terrible, but there was space he could call his own and he could simply run only the ceaseless contraption the Great Being had erected for him. It was foolish, but certainly preferable to spending his time sprinting away from snakes, owls, and the like to strengthen him for inevitable interspecies conflict. There was also the Water Source. He greatly enjoyed the Water Source.

The Great Being seemed benevolent enough, but he heard the noises from afar and witnessed her other creation that resided on the other side of her all-encompassing domain. It seemed to be some sort of runt – a third-shrieking, third-whining, third-laughing beast of unknown of origin. He tried not to let its constant chattering disturb him but he did have to confess a stirring of irritation when it spent too long sprinting about inside its own artificial home. The demented creature ought to have gotten enough of its exercise from that alone, but it used its matching machine on top of it all, occasionally falling asleep on it.

G5 sucked fervently on the end of the Water Source. Her morning sprints had been quite enjoyable and she had enjoyed playing with her fellow creatures even if they were not nearly as exuberant as her old friends had been. There were there and that was what mattered. Dragging one or the other onto the Mighty Spinner was a thrill. That would come later. For now she would simply drain the water and attempt to surreptitiously watch the strange beast that dwelled beyond the tunnel. It was something of a mournful thing that acted as if the weight of the world was on its shoulders.

She was intrigued. Definitely intrigued. Perhaps it was the fact that her immobile friends had been something of a nuisance latterly, but alas she would probably never meet it. Fortunately her sense of curiosity could be cast aside by eating. Or sprinting. Or spinning the Mighty Wheel. So what if she could see its hulking form in the distance. She did not need the beast nor did it appear to need her. Giving a yelp of unbridled joy, she was off to the races.

_14 February_

_H7 continues to wander about its space showing little (though at least not no) interest in the tunnel. G5 has approached it, even stuck one of its tiny paws inside, but it quickly retreated to engage in its chaotic mix of activities, albeit a bit less energetically. I do wonder if its motivation to connect with H7 will increase along with its increasing frustration with the lack of participation of the simulated companions I provided. If so, I expect it will become quite perturbed by the divider._

_Still, there has been encouraging behavior by H7. Even it does not appear capable of complete disinterest in G5 any longer. From my observations it seems to be less dejected and has even begun rebuilding its den nearer to G5’s cage. Perhaps it is merely recognition that nothing will attack from behind in its new home. That is most logical conclusion, though I’ll admit to still harboring false hope that there is a more significant meaning. I wonder when he will approach the edge of the tunnel himself.  
  
_ _H. Granger_

G5 wandered to the edge of the tunnel once again. There was nothing terrifying to sniff and really no way to be attacked (that she knew of). When she’d stepped forward the last time she’d actually noticed there was a wall between she and the furball across the way. G5 didn’t like walls and the other creature’s apparent disinterest. But had he crept closer to the tunnel? Maybe. Or maybe, following her discovery that her so-called friends were fakes, it was just her desire for contact with an actual animal. She hoped it was the former because latter was simply depressing. She knew her habits – as much as she had any – of eating and drinking and sprinting were still there, but the experience simply wasn’t the same without a partner in the mix.

The Mighty Wheel seemed to spin more slowly these days. Whether it was a lack of effort or exhaustion remained unclear, but still she ran and ran and ran away. The act was still freeing, but it would be nicer to really _be_ free. She knew the tunnel was the answer, but what would happen if she tried to cross over onto its side of their shared compartment? She stared at the wall. She would figure it out sooner rather than later.

H7 was _very_ nonplussed. The Great Being had proved to be a disappointment, providing little more than the bare necessities. Even the junk he was made to sleep in wasn’t thick enough and the pitiful pellets tasted like…well, it was hard to tell what they tasted like exactly, but it wasn’t wholly satisfying. He had no choice but to turn his attention to the other side of the compound. The other creature had begun to look different recently. It certainly wasn’t sedate by any means, but at some points it seemed to be dragging itself around, almost as if it was going through the motions. If the Great Being was concerned with its altered state it wasn’t apparent. He wondered whether it was well. A foreign instinct burrowed its way into him – should he help?

The tunnel was, as a result, interesting to him. It would certainly be an avenue to help, but it would be a challenge. There was no way he could see to open it, let alone pass through and the other animal was still running anyway so it must not be too terrible anyway. He resolved to keep an eye on it. Just to make sure nothing changed of course.

_8 March_

_Progress! G5 seems to have returned to a happier state. It is not as exuberant as it was in the beginning but adding the tunnel to its exploration efforts did revive its curiosity. It hasn’t figured out the opening mechanism for the door yet, but it has found it, which appears to have occurred while rifling through its bedding. I hope that G5 will be able to do its part soon._

_I have become convinced that H7 is actually interested in G5. Since my last update it has progressed from resting in close proximity to the tunnel, to peering around the corner, to finally ambling in once. What was fascinating is not simply that it entered, but that it did so while G5 was also in the tunnel! It’s one thing for the two animals to recognize each other or even acknowledge each other from across their respective domains, but quite another for them to actually appear to see each other. They held each other’s attention for a moment at several different times of several days this past week._

_I do believe this is evidence that outside interference was never warranted. I should have ignored the surveyors who were now abandoning me – I have made more progress over the last several weeks than I did over the past nine months under the grant. Outside interference in an enemy to nature.  
  
_ _H. Granger_

The Great Being in itself was of little interest to H7. The Water Source remained in working order and the disgusting food was still provided, but the tunnel…the tunnel. Now, he had seen the other creature fully. Its frantic movements were not purposeless after all – no they were signs of vitality, of health, of joy. They had faded before, but now, in the tunnel, seemed renewed as it danced back and forth, settling each time on the same curious spot on its side of the door. What did it want? Up close now, he could see it was far more similar than it had first appeared. It sported the same eyes, similar fur, and a tail – albeit a longer and more luxurious one. In its eyes were the same keen interest he had developed. Why were they here? Why together? What did it mean to be alone, the two of them, in the playground of the Great Being?

The Mighty Wheel in itself was of little interest to G5. It was not enough to have mere movement. Mere movement without meaning was nothing. Cycling it was the same as playing with the lifeless little beings that she had been dropped in with. Depth was what mattered. The feel of the bedding flying as she sprinted about – especially when she sprinted back and forth down the tunnel. She had caught the attention of the other creature which was well because she had need of him. She had discovered something quite mysterious just shy of the door recently but was unsure of how to use it. Each step generated a small whine, but nothing more. It was as if the door was yearning to be opened and if she was honest with herself she yearned for it too. Imagine all the space to run, but most importantly to finally meet the creature on the other side who had so constantly vexed her. She knew it by its eyes and the spirit that lay in them. It had a calm spirit – or at least one calmer than hers – and she thought its peacefulness might bring her some of her own.

There was the door.

_11 April_

_Time has nearly expired on my project. Achievement 1: Many hamsters and gerbils have been given happy homes. Achievement 2: I have applied for several jobs in the field and have not had my application immediately rejected. Achievement 3: HG-12 appear to have bonded. They have been nearly inseparable since they managed to open the door together – a collaborative effort that they seemed to achieve beyond mere happenstance. I had hoped at the beginning that my search would be more fruitful than just a single pair of animals, but I whatever history records of my experiment – which truthfully only what I keep in this journal – I declare it a success. Critics said that an absurdly social creature like a gerbil could never have a productive relationship with a private-type like a hamster, but as happens so often in science the critics have been proven wrong._

_I intend to use the last two weeks of my grant to finalize my research and report for use in a possible future publication and to disassemble all of the equipment and materials that made the breakthrough possible. I will also release my friends, Harry the Hamster and Ginny (there are truly no other acceptable names beginning in G that I would attach to my work) the Gerbil out into the wild. I have no way of tracking them or seeing them again so I cannot be sure whether their tandem will survive the wild – or whether they’ll survive the wild – but I have hope that somewhere, someday, the two of them are still together back in their natural habitat._

_The door has been opened to future rodent-based research into social integration. I for one intend never to close it.  
  
_ _H. Granger_

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This story began as a troll of a fellow author looking for weird ideas. I suggested Harry the Hamster and Ginny the Gerbil, but after they respectfully (and inevitably) declined, I couldn't get it out of my head. So here it is. 
> 
> I tried to fit the characters to their respective roles (at least to some extent) and hew things extremely loosely to some sort of scientific process. While I’m sure that most of you have probably gathered the significance of the numbers for Harry and Ginny and their trial, in case you have not, each was given their respective quidditch number, which of course, in terms of the trial then adds to twelve. Lame? Possibly. Easter Egg? (Probably) Definitely.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this weird one!


End file.
